Ulster
26 Filth 17
Cardiff came to Ravenhill to get something out
of this match by fair means or (more often) foul.
Cardiff went into the lead with a blistering attack
of dirt and filth which went unpunished by a totally incompetent
referee. Cardiff teams in the past have always been niggley but
that was always more a posturing presence from the likes of "pie
eater extrodinare" Craig Quinell. This Cardiff team is something
else - totally ruthless and committed to cheat at every opportunity.
Rob Howley has obviously learnt well from his time with Wasps.
Ulster eventually awoke after their long layoff
from the game and hit back with a well deserved penalty try when
Cardiff play maker Nikki Robinson cynically blocked off Hugo on
his way through to score.
Ulster went on to dominate the match and treated
the Cardiff tactics with the contempt they deserved. The FRU's player
of the season Roger Wilson went on to cap a fine display with the
match winning score in the 54th minute.
The sad thing is that Cardiff's young back line
showed, in flashes, that they could be very good. Unfortunately
the rest of the team, or more importantly the coaching staff, went
for the failed tactic of intimidation rather than skill. |
HOW THEY STAND
As things hot up this weekend please use our "Cut
Out and Keep" League Table to examine all the
options.
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Yet Another Club to Join
I am pleased to inform the Ulster Rugby public that, due to a continuous
stream of enquiries arriving in my mailbox, we have decided to consider
new applications to join the Grousebeaters.
Here are the ancient criteria for membership of this august group.
(Please note that different details may apply for the September
intake.)
Any one of the following qualifications entitles the holder to apply.
1. The ability to speak English with a Ballymena accent. (This
is sometimes known as Ulster Scots.)
2. Be prepared to buy the organisation's life-president (me) lots
of drink.
3. Be able to hold your drink better than Boomshanka (we recommend
this qualification should only be used as a last resort).
4. Beat some grouse.
5. Be able to understand all Ballpark's posts on the messageboards.
6. Join us for away matches and in GB corner at the Ravers beer
tent.
Applications are invited from all suitably qualified Ulstermen and
woman, and Crafty.
We regret we are unable to consider applications from anyone with
any of the following in their names - dead, ball,big, no., 10, gorgeous
etc., as we still have some standards.
Gary Grousebeater
President, Dictator, Chairman, Driver,
The Grousebeaters UR Supporters Club.
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My Old Man Said Be
An Ulster Fan!
There were some notable absentees from the crowd
this week for this crucial game against Cardiff.
YoungMan's previous claim for
"Ulster Supporter of the Year" lies in
tatters after this veteran of away travel chose (yes chose) to go
on a corporate jolly in London rather than watch
our "Beloved Ulster" in the flesh. YoungMan
tried to excuse his absence by claiming that he was going to the
Army Navy match at Twickers to recruit some new members for his
popular cabaret act (right). There could be some truth in this as
he was spotted in the Twickenham area with a couple of coy-boys.
He's obviously mixing with the wrong sort!
The FRU would have sold the corporate package to
some "merchant banker" like Jamesie or Dead Head and used
to money to feed and clothe some deserving U16 rugby team and brought
them to Ravers to enjoy the game.
Even more shocking, however was the news that Ulster's
own "Hard Core Ultras", the Hounds,
traveled from far and wide to attend a wedding
in N. Ireland on Friday night rather than get their asses to Ravenhill.
Have the Hounds turned into Pups, what has happened to the Legends
of Treviso? Let's all hope that they are not one match
wonders and that they turn up in full voice for Ulster's remaining
matches on the road.
The FRU would have persuaded the bride to have the ceremony at Ravers,
had it covered live at half time by Setanta Sports and saved a fortune
in Wedding videos.
If we're going to give Ulster maximum support
over the next three games we need to be more committed! |
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Sir,
I have to reply to what has been said about the Hounds
of Ulster on your web page.
We have been established since 2003. Since then the Hounds have
been represented at many away match's such as Welford Road, Kingsholm
and the Arms Park.
This season the hounds have had rep's at Glasgow, Borders, Treviso,
Saracen's, Biarittz, Newport and Edinburgh. We also have a number
booked to go to the Scarlets and Osprey's games.
I had to correct you with the one hit wonder statement. We
are the true Ulster away support.
Yours,
Hound.
Dear Ed
Would someone stop the Bandwagon and let them hounds off.............
Yours in Sport,
YoungMan
Dear sir?
The Honds of Ulter are not the "true Ulster away support".
The original Ulster away supporters were the (in)famous Grousebeaters,
and I'm glad to say that this gallant band of eejits is still represented
at all, well nearly all, Ulster away games. Our membership of four
shows how difficult it is for anyone to be accepted into our midst.
(Ok, an exception was made for BP - I think we were pissed at the
time)
For years now, our little red and white tractor has been seen hurtling
up and down the motorways of Great Britain, normally with the brave
Boomshanka running along behind because we hadn't noticed he'd fallen
off the back.
What other bunch of fanatical fans could have tried to book into
the Hotel de Ville in Biarritz? (Useless it was - no bars )
Who else has recreated one of Tommy Bowe's tries at the Sportsground
in Galway?
Who else would have managed to find accommodation in a school's
sick dorm in Glasgow ?(Girls' section)
It is clear these are the true legends of Ulster Rugby - forget
those Bell and Howe guys.
Thank you for allowing me to clarify this important matter.
Yours etc
Gary Grousebeater
Dear Sir
I wish to write a brief response to the recent article and subsequent
letters to the editor regarding the infamous "Hounds
of Ulster"! It is indeed true that a large representative
of our pack had to attend the betrothal of our loyal member "Mad
Dog" on Friday.
Mad Dog regrets his mistake in organising said wedding on the same
day/night as an Ulster Celtic League match against Cardiff, and
has categorically stated that he will accept his punishment gracefully.
The disciplinary committee of the Hounds have yet to decide MD's
fate, although judging by his poor performance during the initiation
ceremony in Treviso we may have to go easy on him!!!
Might I also add that a number of the Hounds will be in attendance
in Swansea. Mad Dog will not be there as he says, "It'll be
too soon after returning from my Honeymoon"! The Hounds are
currently unsure whether that will be down to financial reasons
or groin strain!!!!
Kind regards.
Wolf
President & Founder Member of The Hounds of Ulster
Sir,
I just wanted to helpfully point out there
appears to be a problem with your most wonderful site as I can neither
access the Guestbook nor Download copies of photgraphs.
In respect of the latter, I sincerely hope this is just a temporary
fault. I would not like to think it is the result of "a
dog in the manger" response on behalf of the Editorial
Board of the FRU because of the differences which have forced me
to become an Independent Newspaper Proprietor.
Surely us media Mega Nuts – Magnates- should stick
together !!
Yours truly (cough cough ??)
Deadball – Dromore’s answer to Eddy
Shah |
Competition Corner.
The Ulster Rugby Players are out and about this week.
On Wednesday 10th May, Tyrone Howe, Rory
Best and Stephen Ferris will be at Shoefair
Sports in Banbridge between 3.30 and 5.30pm to meet supporters,
sign autographs and pose for photographs as they aim to keep their
Celtic League title hopes on track.
On Thursday 11th May, Neil Best, Neil McMillan
and Bryn Cunningham will be at SS Moores, 6 Chichester
Street, Belfast between 12.30pm and 2pm.
The FRU will award a FRU T-Shirt hopefully
signed by some of the ULSTER TEAM for the best photograph of you
and player in the most amusing shirt/s.
Below are some of the entries to date.
Dear FRU Sir,
Please accept these two entries into your competition for Ulster
Rugby players wearing fans’ merchandise. Both photos were
taken “down under” last year before they signed for
Ulster (I hope that doesn’t disqualify) when I am ashamed
to say I was doing some recruitment work for a rather disreputable
company.
One of them even got me to bring Mr Harrison’s hat and
they never paid me what they owed (for the hat or the work) –
indeed thanks to them I lost the shirt off my back! Perhaps winning
your prize will go some way to restoring my fortunes.
Yours etc, etc,
R. Constable.
AS YOU CAN SEE THE ULSTER BOYS ARE UP FOR
THIS SO GET ALONG WITH YOUR SHIRTS OR GET DOWN TO FRIDAYS MATCH.
SEND YOUR ENTRIES TO thefru@btinternet.com |
Dancing Derg.
There are still some committed supporters and there
are supporters who need committed. One of the latter, well known
Ulster Supporter Derg Man, got a little over excited on Friday night
following Ulster's fine win over Cardiff.
Mr Derg decided to show the clientele of the Scoop
Bar just why they will be paying £50.00 for next seasons bar
pass with an impromptu display of next seasons eagerly awaited dance
routines.
In the hot and steamy after match atmosphere, a
not so tired and emotional, Derg stripped of to show his rippling,
well oiled pecks, as he gyrated to Ulster classics like "My
Old Man" and "Mary Had A Little Lamb".
It was only when he got to his unique interpretation
of "Stand Up For the Ulster Men" that EventSec moved in
to stop proceedings, much to the relief of the crowd!
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